Nigerians have been urged to celebrate their parents while they are living in order to make them happy and prolong their lives.
Respondents in a survey conducted by the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) in South-South geopolitical zones, all agreed that children should celebrate their parents while they were alive.
They also said that even if wronged by their parents in infancy, they should not pay them back in their own coins.
A cleric in Benin, Pastor Mike Ogbeh, said it was only proper to celebrate parents while they were still alive, and not while they were dead.
“Celebrating them while alive will make them live longer,” he said.
Ogbe advised those who were abandoned by their parents during their childhood not to pay them back with such acts.
“Some people will say that their parents didn’t take care of them while they were growing up and as such, will not take care of them.
“We should not pay evil for evil. The Bible says, ‘Honour your father and mother.’ The Bible didn’t say, ‘honour your parents if they took care of you,” the Cleric said.
Also, the Project Director, Indomitable Youths Organisation, Dr Bright Oniovokuko, decried the situation where some people preferred to organise big burial ceremonies to honour their deceased parents rather than cater for them while alive.
He said: “Some people don’t celebrate their parents while they are alive because of different reasons.
“Some want to acquire much wealth before they start taking care of their parents while some others feel that organising big burial ceremonies when they die equates celebrating one’s parents.
“Some can empty their bank accounts and borrow money or do crazy things to plan burial ceremonies for for their deceased parents while they failed to take care of them when they were alive.
“You see some old people living alone and you ask people around if they don’t have children to take care of them.’
“You get answers like, ‘maybe they didn’t take care of their children and the children decided to abandon them at old age.’”
On his part, the Executive Director of the Seal Newspaper, Mr Chukwunwike Nwu, said in Asaba that not celebrating one’s parents while they were alive was like digging one’s grave.
”Nicco Mbarga, late Cameroonian music star in his evergreen song titled, ‘sweet mother,’ captured the essence of parenthood,” he said.
Nwu also noted that in the Bible, out of the 10 Commandments God gave to man, the only one that has a condition attached to it is the one that says parents should honour their parents.
According to him, the amount of wealth parents bestow on their children is determined by how best such children celebrate their parents when alive.
”Prayers by our parents cannot be quantified, it goes a long way in helping us in difficult times,” he added.
The Proprietor of Job’s Orphanage and Saint Stephen’s Trust Widows’ Home, Agbor, Prophet Joseph Igboho, also stressed the need for parents to be celebrated while they are alive.
According to him, every child must celebrate their parents while they are alive, because there are blessings that follow such celebrations.
”Looking at the Bible, the Book of Ephesians made it clear to us to honour our parents. Honour here means celebrating them spiritually and materially,” he said.
In Port Harcourt, Ms Karina Inemd, a public servant, said that it was very important to celebrate parents while they were still living, not in death.
She said parents should be celebrated when they were living for them to appreciate such gestures.
“Let them hear your beautiful poems, and not when they die you eulogise and celebrate them to impress friends or society.
“It must not be elaborate; do the little you can and they will appreciate you.
“Buy them rappers, slippers and other gifts to appreciate them. No mother will reject such gifts from her children,” Inemd said.
Another respondent, Furstaina Nwanekwu, said that there were many reasons to celebrate parents, especially mothers.
Nwanekwu said that mothers sacrificed their comfort in order to bring others into the world and they deserved to be celebrated.
“Mothers sacrifice their time, their beauty, their pleasures for the sake of their children, especially when they are tender,” she stated.
A retired Director in Tide Newspaper, Port Harcourt, Mr Tonye Ikiromaowie, also said Nigerians should celebrate their parents while they alive.
“I advise children and everyone to celebrate parents while they are living because there are some benefits in doing so, including peace of mind and longevity.
“People should make their parents their friends when they are alive and not when they are gone they begin to realise that they have lost good friend,” he said.
The Director of National Orientation Agency (NOA) in Akwa Ibom, Mr Enoh Uyoh, said in Uyo: “You celebrate your parents while alive. Learn to do it while they are alive, no matter how small.
“Ignorance of what life is all about makes children to wait to celebrate their parents after life.
“If you know what life is biblically, you will celebrate your parents while alive. Whatever you do for them after life is for yourself and not for them.
“You know, some people use the burial of the parents to raise funds for themselves.
“They go cap-in-hand beginning and if you don’t give them, they look at you as if you owe them something.”
Similarly, Rev. Sister Sylvia Ndubuaku, the Matron in charge of Family Life Centre, Mbribit Itam in Itu Local Government Area of the state, underscored the need for celebrating parents while alive.
“It is better to celebrate parents while alive, at least to thank them for being there for us when we were young.
“It is necessary to do so at least to make them happ before they go. When they have gone, whatever we do is for ourselves and not for them.
“Whatsoever we do for them while alive they will remember; that is the joy they have,” Ndubuaku said.
Meanwhile, a parent in Eket, Mr Akaniyene Ekong, has urged government to formulate policies to curtail wasteful spending during burial ceremonies across the country.
According to him, foreign culture gave rise wasting resources during burial ceremonies.
“We Africans have a culture that can never be wiped out from our existence.
“Let’s there be a re-orientation that will take us back to our African culture where children take care of their parents at old age.
“Some of these strange behaviours of some people are religion-based. Some who live in the urban areas refuse to visit the village, believing that their parents are witches or wizards.
“It is only when their parents are dead that they go home and organise lavished parties,” he said.
A guidance counselor in Calabar, Mrs Mercy Bassey, however, said there was nothing wrong in having an expensive funeral for parents if one could afford it, provided one took care of the parents while they were living.
But Bassey said that most times, the deceased so celebrated were people who never had three square meals, healthcare and were quite lonely.
The guidance counselor said celebrating such parents in death was nothing short of hypocrisy.
She said after the investment on the child, parents would feel appreciated when the love was reciprocated in their times of need.
According to her, celebrating parents during their birthdays and wedding anniversaries, the for instance, makes them feel loved and happier as well as increases their life spans.
She added: “Out of anger some children neglect their parents who they feel were irresponsible and did not support them while growing up.
“There is equally the issue of people getting carried away by their status which makes them see their parents as local.
“Also, there is this challenge of having a bad spouse who sees it as a problem when parents are celebrated.”
Dr. Grace Etuk, an Associate Professor in the Department of Social Works, University of Calabar, said that celebrating parents was “nonnegotiable” because everyone would grow old and want to be treated well.
“We are all humans and a time comes when we are no stronger. It is only proper for the person you spent your youthfulness in taking care of to turn around and reciprocate.
“Anyone who is wise and understands that life is a seed will not abandon his or her parents.
“Most times, spending so much during burial is just status-oriented as people just want to use the occasion to show off their wealth,” she said.
Another respondent in Yenagoa, Mr Aaron Tamuno, emphasised the need to celebrate parents while alive.
Tamuno suggested that the Federal Government should devote a day to honour parents for contributing to the development of their children.
Also, a businessman in the Bayelsa capital, Mr Abel Domotimi said, “plan a vacation with your parents. It doesn’t have to be elaborate or costly. (NAN)
